Dear Girlfriend 911: I'm Having An Affair And Can't Let Go Of It

Dear Girlfriend 911,

I read your book and I think you can really help me.  I'm married, but I had a short term relationship with another man, and I feel like I can't let go of it.  I need to find the True Self concepts in your book, and figure out how to send the Goodbye Letter which my heart can't stand to do, but knows that it should.

Thanks for the good information your provide in your book.  It really made me think.

Kind regards,


Dear Amy,

Anytime you're not getting what you want from a relationship or situation, it's causing you more pain than joy, and you feel out of control and disempowered, that's a sure sign that it's time to get out. It doesn't mean that getting out will be for good, but you must change the balance of power. You need to empower yourself, get in the driver's seat and draw a line in the sand. The Goodbye Letter is the perfect way to do that because as I say in my book,  "This is not necessarily a goodbye to your man, but instead a goodbye to the old way of doing things. You are putting
him on notice that the way the relationship has been up until now ceases to exist. Things are going to be different." 

The most important thing you can do when you send a Goodbye Letter is to dig really deep to get to your truth, and then state it. I know from first hand experience how hard it is to face up to your truth, but I also know how liberating it is once you do it. Either, the "other man" will welcome your truth and want something permanent with you, or you'll find out his truth and from that place you will be able to let go. Getting to your truth will also help you figure out why your needs aren't being met in your marriage, and help you decide whether to leave that situation, or stay and work on it. 

This is what I tell all my clients about the difference between being "in your truth" and being "out of your truth." When you're in your truth, you will feel happy, peaceful, calm, in control, empowered, liberated. You will have clarity and present as authentic, and that is the kind of energy you will put out there. When you're out of your truth, these are the kinds of emotions you're likely to exhibit: loneliness, isolation, anxiety, fear, depression, crying spells, feeling trapped and disempowered. 

You deserve only the best and only YOU have the power to create that for yourself in your life. Take the steps and I know your heart will thank you.

Girlfriend 911

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