Here is a great tool to keep yourself on track. Write down what I call an “Anger List.” An Anger List is a reminder of why your man had to go, why you’re doing the Girlfriend 911 program, and why he’s not allowed to come back until he comes up to your standards. We all tend to have “selective memory,” which means we block out the bad times and only remember the really great times, even if they are few and far between.
Your Anger List will help you stay in your truth. Remember the reality of what your relationship was, which was not good enough. Keep your Anger List close by, so that every time you feel yourself getting off track or feeling sorry for your man, you’ll be reminded of why you are doing this in the first place. It’ll keep you grounded, stable, and empowered.
Here is an example of an Anger List:
1. You called me from Vegas and wanted me to fly out to be with you. I
made arrangements to be able to come for the weekend and called you
right back to get the information I needed. You never returned my call.
2. You dumped me for another girl you met two days before my birthday.
We had reservations to go away for the weekend. You broke the news to
me in an email!
3. On several occasions, I was dressed and ready for dates with you that
you canceled only minutes before.
4. You told me to choose items at a silent auction for you to bid on.
Whatever you won, we’d do together. That was such a turn-on. We won
a horseback-riding day trip and a dinner for two. You never took me on
either.
5. We were supposed to have dinner or drinks when I was in town. You
ended up at happy hour with colleagues and said you’d call when you
could break away. Rather than saying it wasn’t going to work, you left
me hanging all night without a phone call.
6. You dumped me for a girl you knew for one day. You called me and
gushed about how in love you were, as if I was one of your guy friends,
not a girl you had been dating for months.
7. You told me that you agreed that we had a soul tie and that what we had
was “real.” Then you disappeared.
8. You asked me out on a proper date (your own words) and then tried
to get out of it after I arrived. Your excuse changed from one thing to
another. You felt bad and downgraded it to a drink and appetizer in the
bar. You promised to make it up to me the next day. You completely
flaked on your promise, but contacted me the following week for a
booty call.
9. You told me way too many inappropriate stories about your past and the
women you have been with.
10.You’ve let me down and broken my heart repeatedly, and you’ve never
once been accountable for your actions.
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