Not sure if you remember me, but you helped me about 5 years ago (OMG!) with my ex who was also the father of my child. I read your book, GIRLFRIEND 911 and implemented the steps. I'm so glad that I didn't end up with him!!!!!
Anyway, I'm on the heels of another breakup. I really liked this guy a lot so I re-read GIRLFRIEND 911, and felt so much more power and strength in who I am now compared to who I was 5 years ago!
So, I wrote my ex (3 weeks ago to this date) a Goodbye Letter after he suggested we hang out as friends. And the whole process has been an honest to goodness text book example of what you say in your book. I just am at awe...and wanted to share it with you. I think the last time I followed your program, he really wasn't the guy for me. Even though I wanted to hold on to him with a death grip so we could keep our family together, he wasn't the one. And I'm soooo okay with that. This new guy, has so much more potential, but I'm willing to let go and surrender so much more easily.
I've enclosed my Goodbye Letter below.
Thanks so much for all your great advice in the book!!!! I'm excited to see where this will end up. Either way, I feel strong and powerful after implementing your program.
Seeing you last night made me realize how much I miss you and how much the attraction is still there. I was excited at the prospect of being able to hang out with you this weekend. When I asked you about Sunday, you seemed a little aloof, did you change your mind?
I have been processing this loss and I have been wondering where it all went wrong. I feel that when we had our relationship talk, we both agreed to keep taking things slowly and felt we were on the same page. I felt you pulling away before that, but understood that maybe you were not feeling the relationship anymore. That's why I initiated the talk to see where we both were. If you weren't feeling it then, I wish that you would have been completely honest with me. It could have saved me some time and heartbreak. The distancing that you showed me when you returned from your trip was disempowering and hurtful.
I feel that you pull away and close your heart when things get real. I know that every relationship goes through periods of disconnection. It's just how it goes. I should have asked you what I could have done to get the connection back, and I'm sorry that I didn't. I would have done anything, and I know you would have done the same. I am still willing to do anything to get it back. I wish you would have asked me what I expect out of you and had been honest if you couldn't deliver. I still don't think you know what I want, and feel that that miscommunication played a big factor in the down fall of everything. I wasn't able to articulate it when we talked a couple of weeks ago, but time and thinking has really allowed me to figure it out.
We've also both agreed that we had some great fun times together, and that this was our most mature relationship with anyone. We did so many fun and adventurous things together, and shared a lot of great memories. You were with me at some really low and healing times. I appreciate your strength in being there for me. Thank you so much. I really wish that you could be with me now and see who I really am when I am a lot stronger.
I totally adore you. I feel like this has been my best relationship. I was excited to have an amazing partner who was goofy, nurturing, an excellent provider, communicative, adventurous and an amazing cuddler. I did see your feelings for me in your eyes a few times.
I want you to know that although I do appreciate your invitation to want to meet up and catch up, I have to be honest and let you know that I want to be more than friends. And if that isn't something that you are interested in exploring, then I will have to gracefully decline the invitation. If it is something that is crossing your mind, I would be open and more than willing to talk.
You have inspired me to be a better person. To seek healing for things that needed healing. All of this in order to be a better partner. Thank you for that. I wish you would have reached out to me when your heart started to close....Mine remained open. It makes me so sad that your heart is blocked and that for some reason a protective wall has come up. I want you to know that you can trust me and talk to me about anything. I know that if we do choose to work on a relationship together, it's going to be amazing. Please don't close your heart anymore, open it up to great love! You are so amazing and deserve to be loved, nurtured and cherished.