Is He Into You? Or Isn't He? 5 Way To Know For Sure!

A client of mine made a choice to get into a "friends with benefits" situation with no rules, no boundaries, and no strings attached. Now after 3 months of great sex and intense chemistry she wants more, but she's not sure if her guy feels the same way. She's been reading the signs, and based on his behavior, she's afraid he doesn't. She sent me this great article, and I especially like number five; "when a woman has sex with a man, oxytocin is released and she will stay bonded with him for up to 3 weeks. Sex doesn’t bond him to you. You have the potential to get hurt from this type of relationship because he’s not into you in the same way you’re into him." I think the lesson here is “friends with benefits” rarely works because 99% of time one person always wants more, and it's usually the woman. So my advice is to skip the “friends with benefits” situation and wait instead for a committed relationship with rules, and boundaries and healthy expectations, where both parties are on the same page. In this scenario, at least you know where you stand and you have a greater chance of protecting your heart.

True Heart Connections!

This came up on my Facebook feed today as a memory and I had to repost. It feels just as powerful reading it now as it did when I originally posted this, WOW!

This really spoke to me! Heart connections can sometimes be so overwhelming in the best possible way!

"You don’t measure love in time. You measure love in transformation. Sometimes the longest connections yield very little growth, while the briefest of encounters change everything. The heart doesn’t wear a watch—it’s timeless. It doesn’t care how long you know someone. It doesn’t care if you had a 40 year anniversary, if there is no juice in the connection. What the heart cares about is resonance. Resonance that opens it, Resonance that enlivens it, Resonance that calls it home. And when it finds it, the transformation begins..." Jeff Brown 

8 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Breaking Up With Someone!

There's a reason so many songs have been written about breaking up, because it's true it's so hard to do! And if you're the one who wants out of the relationship, it's always painful knowing you're going to hurt someone you love. However, I've learned over the years that you have to do what is right for you, because in the end it will be right for your partner as well, even if you can't see it at the time. Here are 8 questions to ask yourself before making the final decision to end your relationship: 

I'm A Guy Who Stopped Dating Because I Found The Next Best Thing!

This came up on my Facebook feed as a memory and I thought it was worth reposting:

Some interesting advice from a man's point of view about what it's like out there to date!

It's refreshing to actually hear a man say that men have soured the world of dating for him with their games and their hookup philosophies. Here's a man who'd rather be true to himself, feed his soul, and wait to see what the universe brings him. He's done competing with other men whose intentions aren't honorable, stating the following, "Yes, I’m a guy, and yes, I’m saying men ruined dating. Why? Well, for the most part, men are devoted players with phobias for commitment and settling down. They’re devoted to the method of being pick-up artists while tallying the number of times they scored along the way."

Obviously this isn't all men, but let's face it, dating is a very different scene today than it was ten plus years ago. The days of courting and romance are practically nonexistent. It's sad really, as courting is probably the most exciting and exhilarating part of getting to know someone new, something I talk about extensively in my book, GIRLFRIEND 911. At the end of the day we are all looking for the same thing--LOVE. But how can anyone find the real deal? You do exactly as this gentleman did. You let it be organic.

Why Modern Dating Makes Me Want To Punch Myself In The Throat!

This is an awesome article and a definite must read!!! I love how the author just tells it like it is.  Unfortunately, she's correct – it is pretty darn depressing out there trying to navigate  the very complicated world of dating and relationships.

"Don’t ask to hangout two nights in a row. If you texted first last time, you have to wait for him to text you first this time. Don’t double text. You can’t assume anything is more than casual, even if you’re having sex. But you can’t talk about it either. If you’re wondering where a relationship is going and you decide to bring it up, every word you say has to be carefully chosen so as to seem okay with any response you’re given, even if you’re not. Everything is done through texting. It’s weird to call someone in the modern world just to have a conversation or try to make plans, so we’re forced to wait anxiously for a response that might not ever come."

In my book GIRLFRIEND 911 I offer women tons of advice as to how to figure this stuff out so it's not so complicated and frustrating.  Starting with: Be real, be honest with your thoughts and feelings, don't play games, mean what you say and say what you mean, communicate how you are truly feeling – what you need and what you want out of any given situation – and watch things become a lot more simplified:

18 Awesome Date Night Ideas!

If you're tired of having the same old date nights and they're getting boring, here are some cool ideas to spice things up that don't include "Netflix," or "chilling!"

4 Ways To Make Love Without Taking Your Clothes Off!

Did you know that physical intimacy is not the only way you can make love to your partner?  There are other ways to "make love" that can deepen your bond and intensify your intimacy, and they don't involve taking your clothes off. Here are some great examples: