Dear GF911: I Don't Want To Be Just A Booty Call
I really need your help. I've been dating Jeremy for about 6 weeks and I realized that he's stopped taking me out on dates and calling me except when he wants a booty call. I’ve allowed this to continue because I kept hoping it would get back to how it was, but I know I was stupid and I know I've should've known better. Yes, I've read your book and I know I dropped my standards and disrespected myself. Last week he told me that he'd met someone else, but I make him happy and he still wants to be friends. I'm so into this guy and afraid if I tell him we can't be friends that I will lose him forever. What should I do?
Dear Feeling Helpless,
The reason you feel this way is because you've given your power over to Jeremy and you've let him make all the decisions here. You're operating from a place of complete and total fear, and that will always make you feel helpless, depressed, and disempowered. As Franklin D. Roosevelt famously said, "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." Healing and the truth will set you free. So start operating out of a place of truth and that will help you get back into your power and feel good about yourself. It might also make Jeremy want to be with you again, because men find happy, independent, and empowered women very attractive. So what's your truth? You can't just be friends with Jeremy, because obviously you want a whole lot more. So let him know how you truly feel about him, and explain to him that unless he feels the same way, and is on the same page as you, he can't be in your life no matter how hard that is. Being friends is not an option because you will always be settling for something less than what you truly deserve.